Today I faced my fears and did something even though I was feeling afraid. There really was no reason for me to experience this emotion, but it showed up unannounced. To the rest of the world, it wouldn’t have made any sense to feel this way, but it was real to me. In fact, I had been dealing with this for the week prior to facing my fear. A million thoughts running through my mind of all the reasons I shouldn’t follow through. Every time a negative thought came my way, I had to combat against it with the truth that I knew would work, and that was God’s Word. It was a constant struggle and battle in every moment leading up to this.
Questions kept coming to me. I even began to second guess why I was even going to do this. Then I began to be plagued with thoughts from the enemy attempting to weigh me down with any form of guilt or shame available in the books. Things that weren’t even true. Just lies, but when you’re in that moment, sometimes you don’t even recognize them as such. Why would I even want to try? My past has been too broken and damaged from things I didn’t ask for. How and why would God want to continue to use me when I feel as if there is just too much back there that I don’t even want to remember, let alone be reminded of and brought with me into my future. Such deep pain that there are no words to express exactly what you are feeling. Pain that wants to take your breath away.
Then that’s when God showed up and gave me the words my soul so desperately longed for and needed at that moment.
As He began to speak truth into my spirit, it changed everything for me. It didn’t change the fact that I was afraid, but it changed my thinking and mindset when He revealed this to me. I had to look beyond my past into where I knew God was leading me. I didn’t need to get stuck there, but I needed to move forward into the unknown where God was. All of the horrible thoughts about my past were all washed away when I saw this beautiful place that God was leading me into. It was a place far greater than anything that was stolen from me or anything I ever had to leave behind. To say that God changed my mind would be too small of a statement. He radically changed everything for me in that moment. Then I knew that it was all going to be more than okay. I knew that I was in the process of entering one of the most beautiful seasons of my life. One I never intended, but God just happened to arrange.
So I did it! Afraid and all, but yet experiencing the greatest peace and contentment at the same time. Once I faced this fear, I looked back and was ever so grateful that I chose to do this afraid even though my flesh kept telling me to back down and not follow through. Then I was able to see just how much the lies from the enemy were really lies and how the truth from God really was the truth. God got the glory in all of this because I simply chose to be obedient in the midst of something that was warring against me in my spirit. Satan, you didn’t win! My Abba Father did!
Whenever you are facing a situation where you are experiencing fear, do whatever it is afraid. Do it even if you’re not sure how it’s going to happen or work out. Face it head on even in the midst of the unknown. God has got you covered, but you must step out into this new territory to watch Him work. You can do this because God is on your side. Just step out!