It’s taken me several years. It’s taken thousands of hours. It’s taken intentional work on my part. It’s taken time spent pouring into healing every part of my broken self to get me where I am today. It’s taken daily surrender to be all that God wants me to be. It’s taken days where I pushed through every negative emotion when all I wanted to do was give up. It’s taken going through a dark pit of depression to know just what a blessing it is to live an abundant life on the other side. It’s taken days where I had to work through life not being fair and realizing that what He has in front of me is greater than anything I ever left behind. It’s taken days spent encouraging myself as I felt all alone on this journey that I’ve been traveling. It’s taken every experience, whether pleasant or painful, to put me where I am today.

I’m in a different place now. I’m a different person. I’m looking back on where I’ve come from. At the time I was going through the worst pain imaginable, I wasn’t able to see with my physical eyes all that I see today. I had to make a choice to look towards my future through eyes of faith, even though it looked quite bleak and dismal at the time. I had to trust God for what I couldn’t see. Looking back is easy, but not when you’re in the thick of things. That’s where the real battle lies.

No one could make the changes I needed to make for me. I had to take responsibility for myself and my future. I chose not to leave God out of this process. This brought on many growing pains, but I survived – and I’ve lived to tell about it. Now I have the joy of sharing this hope that I’ve found with those going through what seems to be hopeless situations in their eyes. Nothing brings me any greater satisfaction that being a conduit of God’s love with hurting people. That is my heart.

Life looks much different for me today. I’ve had to learn a new normal which has been difficult at times, but not anymore. I have learned to love my life right where I am in this season. I’ve learned to enjoy right now and not something far off in the future. I am blessed everyday that I wake up. I’ve been blessed with a family that has loved me through the darkest days of my life. I’ve been blessed with people that have poured God’s love into me when I couldn’t even love myself. I’ve been blessed with the promise of a future and destiny that is bright and right on track for what God desires for me. I’ve been blessed with discovering all over again who I am in Christ. I’ve been blessed with learning to love the woman that God created me to be. I’ve been blessed with learning to love my own company. I’ve been blessed with doing many things afraid. I think you get the picture. I am blessed no matter what my life looks like.

I am still a work in progress. I celebrate where God has brought me, but that’s not the end of my story. That’s just the beginning. I’m still learning and discovering things about myself and God that I never knew. My life is far from perfect, but it’s perfect for me. I owe all of that to God. He is the one that’s been my constant, and He will continue to stay that way. Great things are in store. Will you join me?

4 thoughts on “It’s Different Now…

  1. Every. Word. Only it’s not different for me……yet. I’m just really beginning my journey. Thanks for sharing yours with others.

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